Sharing

So there are things I’ve heard from comedians or on tv or just walking around that I like.  These are things that have no real context, that I have no real reason to mention other than the fact that they generally crack me up, although sometimes it’s that they’re nice or fun or terrible.  These are the kinds of things that, when you tell someone else, they tend to look at you in such a way that you mutter, “I guess you had to be there.”  Still, I enjoy them, so I’m sharing.  Here are a couple for today:

“Self-quacking duck mud.”

Changing the name of “Sex in the City”  to “Three Hookers and Their Mom”

http://www.coxar.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/

 

Countdown to Obama – ONE DAY TO GO!

“I glance at the headlines just to kind of get a flavor for what’s moving. I rarely read the stories, and get briefed by people who are probably read the news themselves.” —Washington, D.C., Sept. 21, 2003.

Remember the idiot jocks in high school that used to get the smart kids to do their homework? Why isn’t this one working at the local Burger King like all the rest?

 

Stuff you don’t need to know

From http://randomeme4u.blogspot.com/ (via Tony C.) for the week of jan 18.2009: Finish the Sentences

1. I wish I could…..get my finances, my house and my life in general under control once and for all.
2. My biggest fear is….spiders?  Well, yes, but also that there not only is a God and that he does, as I have long suspected, hate me.
3. I hate to…..work for other people because I am an elitist bitch who will always, always, think I am smarter than my bosses.  And will generally be right.
4. I love….my kids, my fiance, getting things organized, chocolate, quiet, reading, dancing, singing and cute fluffy kitties.  Oh and pretty pretty ponies.  No, wait…that’s the Xanax talking.
5. Today I will….have dinner with my kids, my fiance and my mom and step-father to celebrate my birthday (which was Friday).  There will be wine, and I will use it as a crutch, thank you.
6. Yesterday I ….. worked, got presents from my co-workers (who I love) and spent time with my kids.  It wasn’t a bad day all-in-all despite the sub-zero temperature.
7. My hair is….red…currently.
8. I will never…give up on the idea that some day I will own my own business and not have to work for other people/corporations that make me want to burn them in effigy.  And by “in effigy” I mean in actuality with lots of kerosene.
Till next time…Stay shiny!

 

Countdown to Obama: Two days and counting

“We both use Colgate toothpaste.” —after a reporter asked what he had in common with British Prime Minister Tony Blair, Camp David, Md., Feb. 23, 2001.

And really, that is where the similarities end.

 

Countdown to Obama: 3 days and counting

A trip to Miami and a shared-with-family bout of the flu interrupted our countdown, so we resume with a mere 3 days left. The excitement is palpable.

“It was not always a given that the United States and America would have a close relationship. After all, 60 years we were at war 60 years ago we were at war.” – June 29, 2006, at the White House, where Bush met with Japanese Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi.

His grasp of both reality and world history continues to astonish and impress.

 

Countdown to Obama: 13 days and counting

“There’s no doubt in my mind, not one doubt in my mind, that we will fail.” _ Oct. 4, 2001, in Washington. Bush was remarking on a back-to-work plan after the terrorist attacks.

Ok, so he was right once.

 

Countdown to Obama: 15 days and counting

“Make no mistake about it, I understand how tough it is, sir. I talk to families who die.” _ Dec. 7, 2006, in a joint appearance with British Prime Minister Tony Blair.

Can we get a president who doesn’t see dead people?

 

Countdown to Obama: 16 days and counting

“Thank you, Your Holiness. Awesome speech.” – April 16, 2008, at a ceremony welcoming Pope Benedict XVI to the White House.

Bet he enjoyed the wine and crackers too.

 

Countdown to Obama: 17 days and counting

As a tribute to our outgoing president, I’ve decided to post some of my favorite quotes that we have been lucky enough to hear over the last 8 years. Here is the first:

“There’s an old saying in Tennessee…I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee…that says, fool me once, shame on…shame on you. Fool me…you can’t get fooled again.” – Sept. 17, 2002, in Nashville, Tenn.

Shame on us all, Mr. President. Shame on us all. Well…not me. I didn’t vote for you either time.

 

Life List #3:How to improve your life in 365 days!

Since this is the time of year when every “woman’s” magazine on the shelves boasts some sort of self-help/lose weight/organize your life article on its cover, and since I’m a huge sucker for all three of those, I figured it was time for me to jump on the bandwagon with my own New Year’s resolutions.   For the record, #1 should have been “Stop Procrastinating” but since it’s now January 2nd and I’m only just starting my list…well, why start my year off with failure?

1.  Work on being on time.  Especially to work.  They’re beginning to hint that those “start times” on my schedule aren’t rough estimates or suggestions.

2.  Clean up my damn house.  By this I mean a) throw out half the stuff in it, b) organize what’s left including finding permanent places for it, and c) keep it clean and organized.  No one should live like this.  Seriously.

3. Plan menus more and actually cook dinner each night.  Even if the kids aren’t home.  Just because I don’t have to make them dinner doesn’t mean it’s ok for me to eat four chocolate chip cookies and call it a night.

4. Blog more.  I like blogging.  I like taking the time to myself to think things through and write about them.  Or to just throw something up here to get it out of my head.

5.  Read more.  I never thought I’d have to include this since I’ve always been an avid reader, but since M. was born I rarely open a book.  I can’t even get through a magazine these days half the time.

6. Organize my money.  Pay bills on time, pay them off, save some…eat out less, rent less dvds…that kind of thing.

7. Start doing Brownies with H. since she’s been wanting to do it as a Juliette since we finished Daisies and I couldn’t run a whole troop anymore.

8. Spend more time with S. while he still wants to spend time with me.  Twelve is only five minutes from 18 and out of the house.

9. Go on a few dates with Chris.  We’ve been together 2 years now, and as far as “real” dates go, where you dress nice and shave your legs and go out to dinner or a movie or something fun without the kids…I could count them on one hand I think.  The trip to Miami is a great start.

10.  Decide if I want to actually start my business or if I want to just scrap the whole idea because I’m not a dedicated enough worker to be my own boss.  Seriously, without a boss there to see, I might not even show up.

So, I think that’s it for this year.  I’m hoping I can actually keep those.  We’ll see.  I don’t usually do New Year’s resolutions because I don’t like having a list of things I didn’t do staring at me at the end of the year, but these are all things that actually matter to me.  Why not try what everyone else does and start fresh in the new year?  Not doing anything hasn’t worked out well so far, so it’s worth a shot.